Some Days

Wednesday, November 4, 2009 -- Week of Proper 26, Year One

Today's Readings for the Daily Office (Book of Common Prayer, p. 990)
Psalms 72 (morning) 119:73-96 (evening)
Nehemiah 13:4-22
Revelation 12:1-12
Matthew 13:53-58

Even though I went to bed early last night, I woke up tired today. I couldn't bring much energy to the Daily Office. The readings seem to fall flat for me.

For a while Psalm 72 sounded like an expression of hope for just governance. The Psalmist asks for a good ruler who will rule rightly, bring justice to the poor, defend the needy and rescue the poor from oppression. There is an appealing vision of bottom-up prosperity. Over and over the psalmist emphasizes that the just ruler will "deliver the poor who cries out in distress and the oppressed who has no helper. He shall have pity on the lowly and poor; he shall preserve the lives of the needy. He shall redeem their lives from oppression and violence..." In such an economy, the psalmist imagines "an abundance of peace" and widespread prosperity.

But there is a troubling aspect to the psalmist vision also. The psalmist expects this ruler to dominate the surrounding nations. Those nations will be expected to pay tribute and to bring gold, just like Israel had to pay cripplings tributes to their conquerors the days of their oppression. I'm reminded how often it is that abused people become abusers themselves when they gain some degree of autonomy or power over their lives.

As I read of Nehemiah's crusade to purify Jerusalem, I thought of the Taliban, a more extreme version of enforced separatist theocracy. The chapter continues with the ethnic cleansing of the city. Everything foreign is excluded from Jerusalem. We've seen the tragic dimension of such cleansings in our lifetime. Like some of the other religions that have texts which have been interpreted as condemnations against us, we have texts that would condemn all foreigners, separate from them radically, and impose religious practices upon all by force. Why aren't the law-oriented Christian groups marching on the mall and working to pass laws to shut down all commerce and commercial transportation on the Sabbath? Some of them approve of Nehemiah's tradition of throwing out all the aliens, but aren't bothered by Sabbath work or by some forms of inter-racial marriage.

And I just didn't have the energy today to work with the reading from Revelation. I know that underneath all of the violence and war-like imagery is a message of grace and encouragement. But reading it today was just tiring.

And the gospel today is a story of a down day for Jesus. He comes to Nazareth, and they take offense at him. Who does he think he is? We know who he is, and we'll keep him in his place, his hometown says to him. "And he did not do many deeds of power there, because of their unbelief."

There are days like that... even seasons. For some, years. Times when we seem to slog to get through. We all have good days, and not-so-good days. Days of energy and creativity and anemic days. Times when things seem to come together and when nothing does. Events of grace and moments of injustice. It's all part of the whole.

Jim Finley tells of his meetings with his mentor Thomas Merton during Jim's novitiate. "How are you doing, Jim?" Merton would ask him. "Great. I feel wonderful and things are going well." "Don't take it too seriously, it'll get worse," was Merton's reply. Or if Jim answered, "I feel terrible. Nothing seems to be working," Merton answered, "Don't take it too seriously, it'll get better."

It's like that. The ebb and tide of things. But there is grace is just showing up. Doing your best even when it doesn't feel like it's enough. Reading and listening and praying, even when there's no experience of resonance. Don't take it too seriously. It'll get better.

Lowell

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About Morning Reflections
Morning Reflections is a brief thought about the scripture readings from the Daily Office of Morning and Evening Prayer according to the practice found in the Book of Common Prayer of the Episcopal Church.

Morning Prayer begins on p. 80 of the Book of Common Prayer.
Evening Prayer begins on p. 117

An online resource for praying the Daily Office is found at www.missionstclare.com
Another form of the office from Phyllis Tickle's "Divine Hours" is available on our partner web site www.ExploreFaith.org at this location -- http://explorefaith.org/prayer/fixed/index.html


The Mission of St. Paul's Episcopal Church
is to explore and celebrate
God's infinite grace, acceptance, and love.

Visit our web site at www.stpaulsfay.org

Our Rule of Life

We aspire to...
worship weekly
pray daily
learn constantly
serve joyfully
live generously.

Lowell Grisham, Rector

St. Paul's Episcopal Church
Fayetteville, Arkansas